insipid

i put the whole thing down. or what was left of it. it made an attempt at looking innocent. i stabbed it with my fork. a few times. it pleaded for lenience. i got a knife and cut it apart. i tore out its innards and feasted on the juicy meat. it lay there, lifeless. defeated. i revelled in the glory of its demise.

so i had a chicken wrap for lunch after missing breakfast due to sheer determination to sleep past noon. i finally got up around 11:30, but that doesn't really matter all that much, really, i think, sort of, probably, perhaps, yes.

what i want to talk about is how my fooking chicken wrap fell apart like a house of cards in a class 1 grade A richter scale 900 style hurricane-tsunami-t0rnad0 bonanza. 'cause when i picked that chicken wrap up, it was anything but wrapped. maybe it's because i'm naturally too lazy to care how my food is eaten, as long as i manage to eat it, but the manner and speediness in which my chicken wrap dismantled itself was absolutely astoundin'.


i picked it up. it fell apart. Bam. that fast. then, in sllllllllllloooooooooooooooooowwwwww motion, the rice fell out... one by one, two by two.. plop plop plop, etc. they showered themselves onto the pristine wonderland that is the 1101 tabletop. one by one, two by two.. bloop bloop bloop, etc.

this is the story of how, for lunch, i paid 5 dollars for one (1) bbq chicken wrap and only ate half (0.5) of a bbq chicken wrap. this is the story of how approximately half of my lovely chicken wrap ended up on the table, looking delicious still but already crawling with pathogens and other strange microscopic organisms that exist solely for the purpose of contaminating my chicken wrap, which they knew i was going to drop.

because i don't know how chicken wraps are supposed to be eaten without having them fall apart and scatter their innards like a bunch of marbles dropped on a surface of solid ice, or something similar..

My poor food. Lamentations.